MIDSEASON ANALYSIS
2005

* BLAZE OF GLORY *

BIG DOG EXPRESS : The much-anticipated debut of self-proclaimed fantasy guru, Chuck Eaker, has now entered our midsts. From the moment he hobbled in on crutches, he coordinated a team around one of the most prolific players in the NFL. LT2 heads his famous tribash choke scheme while Chuck makes the most of this point-barking machine. Early boasting, though, has brought the wrath of the fantasy gods down upon him. The guy can't catch a break! Running up against the best his opponents have to offer week after week {109/gm} has chained this dog to a .500 stake. With more than a month yet to play, he has the mind to take this team past mediocrity, because he is just too damn potent. A #1 PR never held by a team for the first seven weeks of a season, the best is yet to come from this powerhouse.

LYCANTHROPES : This muscled beast has been waiting in the winds all season long for his chance to claim the #1 Power Rank. He has been eyeing that spot and has done everything asked of him up until this point. The thing is, noone seems to challenge him and George has had an easy run of it all year. A 3.5 game lead in the Twilight Division?? Are you kidding me!? He is line to stalk another FantasyBowl bid; a two-year cyclical trend for this guy. Every odd year this century has put him in the winner's circle with a chance to fight it out to the death!!

ROGUES : First time is an anomaly. Second time is a trend. The third consecutive year you overtake your division means that you are now recognized as a true fantasy juggarnaut; a thing never easily earned and not to be taken lightly. What now becomes of that though? Move forward into the holidays in stealth mode? What of those easy losses to the Ghost teams?
Does he play to the level of competition? Better hope not to face one of these spooky fiends in the playoffs!

SLICKS : Catching Carnell in a bottle sparked an early season burst, but this team has since slowly settled into a lead for the wildcard. Peyton leads his troops again and they plod on with a favorable eye towards the best second half schedule imaginable. Tom knows how to play possum; he can stay out of the limelight like he did in 2002 and surprise a lot of folks. Without Priest though, it may come down to a prayer.

NIGHTSHADE : Never has purple blood spilled forth with two opening losses. {We are talking an eight year history here.} But there you have it; a tough row to hoe from here on out. Staying away from those hoes is plan A but, reformulating an offensive scheme supporting a two TE set and trading away a busted roster has brought this team back into the fold.
Firmly behind the werewolf's eight ball Alan is beset, but a winning season is still a favorable destiny.

X-MEN : David to the rescue...yet again. What a waste that this franchise had to be damaged by Joe Martin; a successful entrepeneur in the real world, but as unreliable as they come in ours. David inherited his classic favored players and has organized this 2-4 team back into contention. Hell, even if he doesn't win the division, he might earn a profit by tabbing his most favorited result ~ Best Game.

* SAME OLD STORY *

LIGHTNING : Greg can possibly become the worst owner ever to defend a championship title. It's still too early to race to conclusions, but the sun is in the sky on this. Many old habits trickled back into his psyche including a propensity to relive last year with the same players {nonproducing currently} and his annoying debt-ridden ways. Yes, the same static that shocked the league last year has reversed upon its owner. Time to plug in a new concept soon or hit the circuit breaker on this season.

PLAYMAKERS : This rookie coaching tandem had the makings of big happenings coming into our league. We are talking about the big beef making his presence known here. But what we got was an organization in complete disarray. The actual players are doing fine, but the problems start with an owner short on attention span and a manager lacking operating skills. Communication lines are down, lineups are riddled with player BYE weeks and a flirtation with a forfeit? Come on. Scandal is what it is, people... S-K-A-N-D-E-{double} L. There will be much overhauling in the offseason I am sure.

HERKIMER HAMSTERS : How does this guy do it?! I am flabbergasted because he isn't strong anywhere in his whole roster! Every year, the critics write him off, yet in the end, he is right in the thick of things. This little rodent even expressed himself by punching the big dog in the chops!! I guess some teams own a little more magic than others...let's see if he can cage it this year.

GHOSTS : Man, this team is spooky. In contention for a wildcard?! Say it ain't so! Thus far, they earned their appropriate victories, but they should get vaporized from here on out.

EXECUTIONERS : Remember I talked about trends earlier? This guy is purely killing himself with a lackluster roster and unproven talent. I can't say for sure if Luke has what it takes to be a future contender. I mean, after all, it took Tim Seymour five years to snap out of it. By all accounts then, I would challenge this belief of hardluck loser since one only learns after hitting rock bottom. Luke's rock bottom was in 2004. Can he get off the snide and take some pride?

PHANTOMS : I guess you never materialized into anything worthwhile, huh? You are on pace for your four wins this year, though. Keep bending over buddy.

History and time are products of the ego. In the realm of Absolute, there is nothing to record.
{Samuel Johnson}


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